Stop reading now if you don’t want spoilers on week five part 2 (which is also being referred to as Week 6) of Sean Lowe’s season of The Bachelor (original air date: Tuesday, February 5, 2013).
So as I mentioned in my last recap, this week we got two episodes of the Bachelor. Woot!
Sean and his harem are in Canada; specifically, Lake Louise in the Rockies. The ladies settle into their hotel and the Tierra drama is still on the top of everyone’s mind.
The adorable Catherine gets the first one-on-one date card, and she’s thrilled. She waits for Sean outside in a blizzard and he eventually emerges in a snow bus that looks like a monster truck. They’re in Jasper National Park and they’re going to do something involving a glacier. Walking on one? Making one? I tuned out. Sean and Catherine have a great playful vibe and genuinely just seem to have a lot of fun together. Catherine “passes the blizzard test”, whatever that means.
For the evening portion of their date, Catherine and Sean take a ‘fairytale’ horse and carriage ride through the snow and arrive at an ice castle thingy. Not everything involving a horse is a fairytale, guys. See: glue.
Meanwhile, in the hotel of hostility, the group date card arrives and the increasingly irrelevant Daniella is bummed that her name is on the card, as she is pretty much the only one who hasn’t had major alone time with Sean yet and it doesn’t look like she’ll be getting any this week. Even Tierra has managed to spend a lot of time alone with Sean despite not having had a one-on-one yet either.
Back in the ice castle, Catherine tells Sean that when she was 12 and away at summer camp a girl she was on a hike with was instantly killed by a falling tree limb. This shaped her view of love and relationships and she doesn’t take anything for granted. Sean likes her outlook and gives her the date rose.
It’s group date day! Sean tells the ladies that they’re going to be getting in canoes (again). But no race this time! Lesley jumps in Sean’s canoe (not a euphemism) and they head out across beautiful Lake Louise. The canoes come ashore and though the ladies were anticipating hot tubs or smores, they instead are told that they’re going to be swim suiting up and jumping into the freezing cold lake. Lindsay, the self-described outdoorsy girl, is amped. Everyone else looks terrified. Tierra looks like she’s about to cry or maybe poop. Or both. Selma bails, but worries that Sean will be disappointed in her. In contrast, Lesley is totes willing to get hypothermia for a rose. AshLee is super nervous but at the last minute decides to go for it.
Shortly after getting out of the water, Tierra starts to shut down. She’s having trouble breathing. and is grabbing onto the lifeguard for dear life. The onsite medical peeps wrap her up and carry her to a waiting car. Tierra is violently shaking despite the thermal blankets, but is still pouty at missing time with Sean. Seriously.
The other girls return to the hotel all hooting and hollering about how fun the ice cold plunge was. The ladies start to suspect that Tierra was faking hypothermia for attention from Sean. While I don’t think she was faking hypothermia, I do think she was definitely milking it a bit. But really at this point, because of her past behaviour, Tierra can’t win. She could be shot by a crazed Bachelor fan on camera in front of the other ladies and they’d be all: “There she goes again, getting shot for attention. Typical.” And much like her fall down (up?) the stairs a few weeks ago, if this drama is part of Tierra’s plan for Sean’s attention it’s working. Sean shows up to find her hooked up to oxygen and crawls into bed with Tierra who tells him that he better marry her now (just joking). Sean mentions that Tierra always finds ways to get alone time with him (hahahahaha). He also encourages her to rest instead of joining in on the balance of the group date later that evening.
The group date girls (minus Tierra) arrive in the hotel lobby (?), excited for a (hopefully) drama free evening and more time with Sean. Lesley has been making a strong play for Sean all day and is the first to get some alone time with him. They have great chemistry. Later he sits down with Sarah and she shows him family photos and talks about her childhood and learning to do everyday stuff with only one arm. Sarah tells Sean that she hopes that she will stick around long enough for him to meet her family on the hometown dates.
Desiree and Catherine are hanging out in their hotel suits, waiting for Desiree’s solo date card to arrive. Catherine muses that Desiree is getting a second one-on-one date while, Tierra and Daniella haven’t had one-on-ones yet. Tierra is hiding out in the bathroom putting on makeup and preparing to join the group date, frozen limbs be damned.
Back on the group date, the ladies are sitting around plotting Tierra’s demise when Tierra unexpectedly arrives, epitomizing (to quote the women): ‘How to Fake an Injury:101’. The ‘Tierra-ist’ moniker is also back. I’ve missed it.
Sean immediately pulls Tierra aside and asks her if she would want a proposal at the end if they were to fall in love on The Bachelor. She gives some bullshit answer. Sean also notices that her hands are super warm and Tierra responds that her body is super cold. Huh?
Lindsay interrupts them and her and Sean are soon making out.
Sean eventually gives Lesley the date rose (oh thank god, I thought he would give it to Tierra again, thus validating her dramatic antics), and the other ladies are even happy for her because it’s NOT TIERRA.
Later that evening, Sean realizes that he’s not seeing “a forever” with Sarah. He makes his way to Sarah’s hotel room and pulls her away from the other ladies. Sean tells her that he doesn’t really have the feelings that were there when he picked Sarah for the very first one-on-one date. Sarah is super sad and feels understandably blindsided, but appreciates that Sean didn’t keep her around through another rose ceremony. Sarah says her goodbyes to the ladies and Sean feels just awful about the whole thing and walks her out to the au revoir car.
The next day, Desiree heads out for her second solo date with Sean. They hike through Banff National Park and he announces that they are going to repel down a 400 foot mountain to go eat lunch. SO JEALOUS. They survive (yays) and chat lots over lunch. Desiree was feeling shaky in Montana but Sean reassures her that he has strong feelings for her. They climb a tree, scream “Hello Canada” (probs causing an avalanche somewhere), and just like that Desiree and Sean are back on track.
Later that evening, Sean and Des snuggle up near a fire pit in a tepee. Turns out, Des grew up poor. She believes this has made her humble. [Side note: I’ve never heard anyone refer to themselves as humble, and it rubbed me the wrong way for some reason. Just me?] Anyways, she had a happy childhood, regardless, and takes nothing for granted. She says some weird shit sometimes, and her shots at Tierra annoy me a bit but overall I think Desiree is probs going to stick around until the final four. She’s less annoying than some of the others (Daniella and Tierra, mainly) and that’s something, right? Sean presents her with the date rose.
Rose ceremony night is upon us once again, and Tierra is being her usual pouty self. Lesley, Selma and Desiree huddle up to talk about her constant drama and Selma delivers my favourite line of the night, speaking about Sean and Tierra: “Let’s be honest. You’re gonna wife that?”
Sean arrives and gives a toast. This week was way better than Montana and he’s in much better spirits compared to the previous rose ceremony.
Sean and Selma chat and – although she wasn’t able to kiss him on their one-on-one date during week 4 because of her culture – she plants a forced un-reciprocated kiss on Sean and moans that her mom will be super pissed.
Lindsay and Sean are the next to venture off, and Lindsay announces that they aren’t going to kiss so they talk instead. And then she tells him she sleeps naked. Sean approves. They keep trying not to kiss and fail. It’s less cute than it sounds.
AshLee and Sean pull away and, in an effort to lighten up her control-freak instincts, AshLee pulls out a blindfold and asks Sean to blindfold her and lead her somewhere so that she can let him take control and trust him to do that. He ends up carrying AshLee to a couch and the whole experiment sort of falls flat and seems..forced on Sean’s part. AshLee tells Sean that she adores him.
Chris Harrison arrives to signal the start of the rose ceremony and remind everyone that Sean is to send home two women tonight. Wow – that means three ladies are going home on week 6! The first rose goes to Lindsay, followed by AshLee. Daniella, Selma and Tierra are left vying for the one remaining rose.
The final rose goes to Tierra, so Selma and Daniella are going home.
I strongly suspected Daniella would be out, but it was a real toss-up between Selma and Tierra. In her exit interview, Selma hopes that Sean doesn’t end up with Tierra. Daniella feels heartbroken and complains that she never really got a shot with Sean.
Back inside, Sean’s excited to celebrate with the final 6 ladies. He announces that they’re heading to St. Croix. So we’ll be seeing a lot of bikinis next week.
In the closing credits, Sean shares a story with Lindsay about peeing in a desk drawer at age 4. WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON SEAN. Kidding. Maybe.
Back next week!