If Two Dumbasses Get Married

In L.A. and I’m not there to see it happen but they sell the pictures to USWeekly, do I still get to not care?
So Heidi “I Heart Jesus” Montag and Spencer “Douchebasket” Pratt got married over the weekend in Los Angeles.
Heidi wore a beautiful Monique Lhuillier wedding dress, and her hair was so bleached that people in the first two rows went temporarily blind. Spencer continued to look like a possessed cabbage patch doll. Kristen Cavallari of Laguna Beach “fame” caught the bouquet. Lauren Conrad showed up at the nuptials, thus fulfilling some sort of contractual obligation, no doubt.
Pictures posted here on popsugar, if you care: http://www.popsugar.com/3077785?page=0,0,0

I need a poptart and a percoset to get me through this one.

Photo is from PerezHilton.com

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